16. One Question to Unlock Lasting Leadership Confidence
Do you ever feel stuck, unsure of your next move? How often do you let self-doubt or other people’s opinions take the driver’s seat in moments of indecision?
We've all been there - spinning our wheels, doubting our abilities, letting limiting beliefs hold us back. But what if a single question could unlock the clarity, confidence, and capability you need to feel to propel yourself forward? Growth doesn’t happen by accident. It requires intentional action and a shift in mindset. And in this week’s episode, I reveal the transformative power of asking yourself the right question at the right time.
By regularly asking yourself this one question, you'll naturally align your actions with your highest potential as a leader. You'll cut through the noise and focus on solutions, not problems. Listen in and get ready to change the trajectory of your life as you discover the key to lasting, sustainable change in how you show up in the world.
If you haven’t already, please follow the podcast and leave a rating and review to let me know what you think. I'm creating this show just for you, so I want to know what you would like to hear about in the coming episodes. Find complete instructions here!
What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
Why confidence is imperative for attracting what you want in life.
How your internal dialogue impacts your actions and holds you back.
The cost of letting doubt and limiting beliefs take the driver's seat.
Why intentional action, not just any action, leads to growth.
How to shift from a mindset of insecurity to one of empowerment.
The one question that instantly provides clarity and unlocks self-confidence.
How to put this powerful question into consistent practice to build confidence.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
If you haven’t already, please follow the podcast and leave a rating and review to let me know what you think. Find complete instructions here!
Full Episode Transcript:
Imagine if you had a single tool that could lead to lasting, sustainable change in your confidence and how you show up in the world. A question so powerful that when asked regularly, it naturally shifts you into taking action that aligns with your highest potential?
Today, I'm sharing that question with you. It's the key to unlocking clarity, confidence, and capability in a way that doesn't just create short-term wins, but builds the kind of transformation that lasts. If you're ready to change the trajectory of your life, stay with me, because this one question is about to do just that.
Welcome to The Balanced Leader, hosted by Yann Dang, a Leadership and Life Coach with over 20 years of corporate experience. Drawing from her journey as a former global finance leader and second-generation immigrant, Yann understands the unique challenges women face in male-dominated workplaces.
Each episode offers insights on balancing masculine and feminine energies, mastering soft skills, and building emotional intelligence. Join us to transform frustration into empowerment and unlock your authentic leadership potential.
Okay, welcome podcast listeners. Today's episode is about the one question that can change everything. This is really about the importance of confidence, clarity, and capability in our personal and professional lives. I'm going to talk to you more about this as we dive in and share the question, but before I dive into that, I really want to set the scene up for you and explain to you why confidence is so important.
I know you already feel confidence is important, but this metaphor really hits home. It's something I shared recently in the confidence workshop that I gave. And this metaphor helps you to see why it's not only important, but it's imperative and helps you to create more of what you want in your life. And it's such a simple metaphor, but stay with me.
I want you to imagine that it's your birthday and that your partner, your good friend, your husband, your wife is coming home with a present for you. You are so excited to see what it is. So when your partner comes home and shows you this present, it is wrapped beautifully. Bright colors, big bow on top, you are so excited to see what's inside. You immediately want to have it in your hands, touch it, and you almost don't wanna open it up because you're so excited, because it looks amazing, but then you are also really curious about what's inside and what will unfold as you see and open this present.
So that's one scenario. The other scenario I want you to think about is, again, your partner comes home, it's your birthday, and he or she is carrying a bag. It looks like a grocery bag or it looks like a bag from like a gas station. And you're more suspicious. You're like, that can't be my present.
This is so weird and it doesn't look inviting and exciting and you kind of have this emotional reaction to it that like, that can't be your present and I don't want that to be my present. So I just want you to notice that there could be the same thing inside, the same present. And I give this as a metaphor because you are somebody who has experience, expertise, certifications. You are somebody who is full of ideas and has really a lot to contribute and to impact in the world.
But how you show up really matters. If you are showing up like a beautifully wrapped, sort of polished, but confident, clear, playful person, people are going to be drawn to you. Versus if you are coming in to a new office and you are a pile of nerves, you're questioning yourself, you are wondering if you are meant to be there, if you're good enough to be there and your energy is not one that exudes confidence, then people are not gonna be as excited to be around you.
Even though in both of the metaphors that I'm giving you, in both cases, it's the same thing inside. You're still a person that has all of your experiences, accomplishments, education, expertise in both scenarios. But in one scenario, you are attracting, inviting people in with your confidence and your energy.
And in another scenario, you may be repelling people, people may be questioning you, just like that present. That present is either gonna be inviting because of the way that it looks and helps us feel before we even get into it, or it looks like a plastic bag that feels like a little bit of a letdown, and you're kind of questioning the whole thing.
So I just give you that as an example because this is really the power of confidence and having confidence in ourselves versus these self-imposed limitations that we might have. And with women that I often coach, right, it's a lot of internal stories, fears, or doubt.
When we're struggling and we feel unclear, hesitant, or incapable in our own abilities, it ends up showing up in the way that we present ourselves. So this is why the one question that I'm going to share with you in this episode is so important because it really helps us to shift into gear and helps us to show up the way that is going to be more inviting, that is leveraging and amplifying all of the things that we have to offer in the world.
But let's start off with the power of self-belief. The more we tell ourselves something, the more we are noticing these patterns in our brain. Our brain naturally defaults to the thoughts that we have about ourselves, even if it feels like anxiety inducing. It makes us feel insecure and limiting ourselves. Our brains will naturally still go to that, especially when we're tired, because those neural pathways have been used over and over again.
So oftentimes, if your thought about yourself is, I'm not good enough, I don't know enough, I feel scared, I need to wait and see what other people are doing. You just wanna know what your limiting pattern is. Because this limiting pattern has a cost to you. Maybe you don't speak up. Maybe you doubt your abilities. And even though you have a really reputable, proven track record, you may play it small in moments that could really propel you or are pivotal to your growth. And that may cost you in your career.
This internal dialogue, this self-talk keeps us living in the past. Our brains will naturally default to familiar thoughts, what's comfortable, what feels safe for us. Maybe it feels safer for us to feel like we're gonna fail or that we're not enough or that we don't know enough because it helps us to just be like, not move forward.
It keeps us in this pattern of, even though it doesn't feel great, it keeps us safe because we don't speak up so we don't put ourselves in harm's way for saying the wrong thing. We doubt our abilities despite a proven track record and our reputation. And so we're playing it small in moments that could really propel our growth and could be pivotal to our next leadership role.
So I want you to consider, how are these limiting thoughts impacting you? And what if a simple shift in the way you think could unlock everything You're truly capable of this is really how?
Impactful the way we think and the way we talk to ourselves is and this internal shift can really help us to move from feeling insecure to empowering ourselves just by asking ourselves questions that get our brain moving towards intentional action versus staying stuck.
It sounds simple, and I always tell people this, sounds simple, but it's not always easy to do. Our brains have thought certain thoughts for a long time, but if we're not onto ourselves and if we're not consciously observing our thoughts, if we're not aware of how we're talking and thinking about ourselves, then it could really impact how we grow so that need for intentional action is important.
But oftentimes I tell my clients that you need to slow down to move fast because if we're just quickly moving and we're in the survival mode and we're doing, doing, doing, then you start feeling like you're on a hamster wheel. I want you to consider how shifting from a place of insecurity to empowerment, it doesn't just happen by accident, it requires intentionality. It requires us to be onto ourselves and to notice our thoughts and what we're spinning in and what we're allowing ourselves. It could be very simple, like asking yourself the right question, which I want to talk about next, but first let's talk about the need for intentional action.
Growth isn't passive. You don't just wake up one day and suddenly feel confident, clear, and capable. It's something you consciously create. And I want to explain that in today's society and our consumer capitalist market, most people and most companies want us to think that we don't know enough, that we need something else, that we are not enough because they want to sell us things.
So we're always, especially as women, if you're on Instagram or if you're watching something, there's always somebody that wants you to have this belief that you're not enough. It's very appealing for somebody on the other end to say you're not enough. Buy this thing, get this bag, get this education, get this certification, do this, do that, fix yourself. There's something wrong with yourself.
So not only do you have beliefs about yourself and insecurities that maybe experiences in your life have created, you're also, depending on what you watch and what you allow yourself to feed on, what you put in your brain, you could also get a lot of thoughts from society, from the culture, from commercialization, that you need more, that you're not capable, that you need to buy this thing or lose weight or get this other certification.
But I want to ask you, how often are you asking yourself empowering questions versus letting doubt take the wheel, take the driver's seat of your car? How often are you mindlessly or on autopilot allowing people to put thoughts in your head? Whether it's watching commercials, whether somebody is telling you you need to work on this, maybe you're also somebody who's out there asking people, what's wrong with me? How can I get better? But even that question assumes that there's something wrong with you.
If you want to be thinking about yourself in a more empowered way, if you want to be intentional about the questions you ask for yourself, then you need to nurture the thoughts that you have and the questions you ask yourself. What you water grows. So oftentimes people are like, the grass is always greener over there once I get something. But what I want to offer you is the grass is green where you water it, where you really focus on it.
Your thoughts shape your reality, and if you want different results, then you're going to need to work on these different thoughts. I know most of the world likes to just take action and action and action, but I'm talking about here intentional, purposeful, sustainable action through asking yourself an empowering question.
Most people wanna focus on why I can't, what's wrong with me, what's broken about me, What do I need to be successful? Most people are not focused on what can I do in the here and now with what I have to solve my problem? Successful leaders focus on solutions not problems. So you want to notice for yourself when you are thinking, what if you could cut out that noise? What if you could cut through it?
What if instead of spiraling in doubt, you could ask yourself one transformative question that instantly moves you forward towards a solution that is really focused on your ability and your capability and helps you to not indulge in those self-limiting beliefs or what society wants to feed you, but really helps you to stay on top of yourself, stay on top of what truly matters to you, and also stay on top of believing in the capability you already have.
So, are you ready to hear this question? It's a very simple question, but it has the power to totally shift you. I wanna share that I use this with a lot of my clients, and as soon as I ask this question to them, they move from spinning, from questioning themselves, to getting very clear, very certain, very convicted in their next step. And it's almost like this question just taps into that part of their brain that was always there, but they're just not used to watering. And so this is really the power of the question.
I almost feel like I need a drum roll, Like drum roll, reveal. This is the question. “If I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I need to do next?"
I know it sounds simple, but just sit with me, sit with this question. When you're spinning, when you notice yourself questioning yourself, but you slow yourself down and you say to yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I need to do next?
And I really want you to breathe in those words. I am clear, confident, and capable. Don't just say it to yourself quickly. It's really important that you slow yourself down, say the words to yourself, notice the emotions in your body, notice what happens when you ask this question. It forces you into a mindset of clarity, confidence, and capability, regardless of how you feel in that moment.
So like I told you, my client was spinning. She was like, I need to reach out to the CEO. I have an intro to him. I don't know what to do next, I'm wondering if I should prepare a long email to write to him to share my case, or if I should do more work and then reach out to him. And I literally asked her this question. I was like, hey, take a deep breath. If you are clear, confident, and capable, what would you do next?
And it only took her not too long, right? She was noticing that question. It aligns you with the actions of the person you want to be, it really puts everything front and center and focus, and your brain starts finding solutions from a place of power and not fear. And so she just answered that question for herself really easy.
She said, actually I would email him, just let him know what my availability is, share that I'm excited to see him. And then on the back end, I would do some research around the company, make sure that I have the notes that I need, and I would move forward in that way. So clear, so confident, so capable of whatever is next.
She's just noticing that this simple question could shift you from feeling overwhelmed, questioning yourself, and this works at home and at work. In meetings, when you feel hesitant to speak up, ask yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next?
I want you to notice that in the question, it's not saying how do you do this perfectly, which is what your mind or your brain might be offering you that you have to do it perfectly. Instead, it's just saying, hey, if in this moment I'm feeling clear, confident, and capable, what's my next move? My next move could be asking a question. My next move could be being more present in this moment. My next move could be asking myself what is most important.
At home, when we're juggling work and personal commitments, it can feel so overwhelming. And this indecision can feel like, you know, we're unsure, get us stuck in analysis paralysis. But just by asking yourself this question, it can snap you out of it.
I wanna share a personal example for me because I was in the midst of making all of these travel plans for me and my family for the year, you know, it's the beginning of the year, I wanted to get all of this settled, it's a practice that I've been wanting to focus on to ensure that I have the rest that I need, the vacation time that I want to have.
And so as I started doing this process, I noticed myself, oh my gosh, so many logistics. What if this, what if that, all of this like worst case scenario. And I just wanted to be like, forget it. I don't wanna do this. I don't wanna plan these trips. It's too overwhelming. I am feeling too much stress. And then I asked myself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next?
And I just sat with that question and I got really clear. I had four trips that I was planning and I got super clear about what I would do. I said, if I am clear, confident, and capable, these are the decisions I would make. So that question helped me get to that decision. It helped me get to what really matters to me. What do I want out of this? What am I willing to do? It helped me to make that decision quicker and it helped me to remind myself that I am fully capable of doing this.
So I want you to go out and practice this. Now that you know the question, the next step is to put it into practice. This is really about building your confidence using consistent action. Each time you're faced with a decision or a challenge, pause and ask, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? Then do that thing. Watch how things start to shift.
And if something happens again, and you get into that cycle of like, oh my gosh, what do I do next? Ask yourself that question again. If I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? First, use this in small ways and build up your consistency and your confidence in it, and then start using it in bigger ways.
But the more you use it, the more you ask yourself this question in a really intentional way, the quicker you're going to shift naturally over time to believing in your clarity, in your confidence, in your capability.
So when I talk to my clients and I ask them this question, they know, they already start asking them questions in advance and they shift to themselves much more quickly. Instead of allowing all of that spinning, that limiting belief talk, that negative self-talk, worst case scenario, they shift themselves.
But it is really, and this is the big underline, it's not just saying it to yourself and rushing into action, it's saying it to yourself and truly believing it. And if you believed it, what would you do next? You need to do this practice over and over again and see what happens for you. See what changes for you as you stop entertaining the thoughts that you're not enough.
Remember, the difference between staying stuck and moving forward is often just one question. So ask yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? You'll be amazed at the doors that open when you lead with this mindset. And the sustainable change you'll have in yourself as you keep mastering this, asking yourself that question.
I invite you to share with me how things are changing as you keep doing this and what's coming up for you. I'd love to hear from you. So feel free to DM me on LinkedIn, leave a review, connect with me directly over email. I would love to hear how this one question is having you show up in your life.
So until next time, keep stepping into the clear, confident, and capable leader you are. I'll see you soon.
Thank you for being a part of The Balanced Leader community. We hope you found today's episode inspiring and actionable. For more resources and to connect with Yann, visit us at aspire-coaching.co. Until next time, keep leading with confidence and purpose.
Today, I'm sharing that question with you. It's the key to unlocking clarity, confidence, and capability in a way that doesn't just create short-term wins, but builds the kind of transformation that lasts. If you're ready to change the trajectory of your life, stay with me, because this one question is about to do just that.
Welcome to The Balanced Leader, hosted by Yann Dang, a Leadership and Life Coach with over 20 years of corporate experience. Drawing from her journey as a former global finance leader and second-generation immigrant, Yann understands the unique challenges women face in male-dominated workplaces.
Each episode offers insights on balancing masculine and feminine energies, mastering soft skills, and building emotional intelligence. Join us to transform frustration into empowerment and unlock your authentic leadership potential.
Okay, welcome podcast listeners. Today's episode is about the one question that can change everything. This is really about the importance of confidence, clarity, and capability in our personal and professional lives. I'm going to talk to you more about this as we dive in and share the question, but before I dive into that, I really want to set the scene up for you and explain to you why confidence is so important.
I know you already feel confidence is important, but this metaphor really hits home. It's something I shared recently in the confidence workshop that I gave. And this metaphor helps you to see why it's not only important, but it's imperative and helps you to create more of what you want in your life. And it's such a simple metaphor, but stay with me.
I want you to imagine that it's your birthday and that your partner, your good friend, your husband, your wife is coming home with a present for you. You are so excited to see what it is. So when your partner comes home and shows you this present, it is wrapped beautifully. Bright colors, big bow on top, you are so excited to see what's inside. You immediately want to have it in your hands, touch it, and you almost don't wanna open it up because you're so excited, because it looks amazing, but then you are also really curious about what's inside and what will unfold as you see and open this present.
So that's one scenario. The other scenario I want you to think about is, again, your partner comes home, it's your birthday, and he or she is carrying a bag. It looks like a grocery bag or it looks like a bag from like a gas station. And you're more suspicious. You're like, that can't be my present.
This is so weird and it doesn't look inviting and exciting and you kind of have this emotional reaction to it that like, that can't be your present and I don't want that to be my present. So I just want you to notice that there could be the same thing inside, the same present. And I give this as a metaphor because you are somebody who has experience, expertise, certifications. You are somebody who is full of ideas and has really a lot to contribute and to impact in the world.
But how you show up really matters. If you are showing up like a beautifully wrapped, sort of polished, but confident, clear, playful person, people are going to be drawn to you. Versus if you are coming in to a new office and you are a pile of nerves, you're questioning yourself, you are wondering if you are meant to be there, if you're good enough to be there and your energy is not one that exudes confidence, then people are not gonna be as excited to be around you.
Even though in both of the metaphors that I'm giving you, in both cases, it's the same thing inside. You're still a person that has all of your experiences, accomplishments, education, expertise in both scenarios. But in one scenario, you are attracting, inviting people in with your confidence and your energy.
And in another scenario, you may be repelling people, people may be questioning you, just like that present. That present is either gonna be inviting because of the way that it looks and helps us feel before we even get into it, or it looks like a plastic bag that feels like a little bit of a letdown, and you're kind of questioning the whole thing.
So I just give you that as an example because this is really the power of confidence and having confidence in ourselves versus these self-imposed limitations that we might have. And with women that I often coach, right, it's a lot of internal stories, fears, or doubt.
When we're struggling and we feel unclear, hesitant, or incapable in our own abilities, it ends up showing up in the way that we present ourselves. So this is why the one question that I'm going to share with you in this episode is so important because it really helps us to shift into gear and helps us to show up the way that is going to be more inviting, that is leveraging and amplifying all of the things that we have to offer in the world.
But let's start off with the power of self-belief. The more we tell ourselves something, the more we are noticing these patterns in our brain. Our brain naturally defaults to the thoughts that we have about ourselves, even if it feels like anxiety inducing. It makes us feel insecure and limiting ourselves. Our brains will naturally still go to that, especially when we're tired, because those neural pathways have been used over and over again.
So oftentimes, if your thought about yourself is, I'm not good enough, I don't know enough, I feel scared, I need to wait and see what other people are doing. You just wanna know what your limiting pattern is. Because this limiting pattern has a cost to you. Maybe you don't speak up. Maybe you doubt your abilities. And even though you have a really reputable, proven track record, you may play it small in moments that could really propel you or are pivotal to your growth. And that may cost you in your career.
This internal dialogue, this self-talk keeps us living in the past. Our brains will naturally default to familiar thoughts, what's comfortable, what feels safe for us. Maybe it feels safer for us to feel like we're gonna fail or that we're not enough or that we don't know enough because it helps us to just be like, not move forward.
It keeps us in this pattern of, even though it doesn't feel great, it keeps us safe because we don't speak up so we don't put ourselves in harm's way for saying the wrong thing. We doubt our abilities despite a proven track record and our reputation. And so we're playing it small in moments that could really propel our growth and could be pivotal to our next leadership role.
So I want you to consider, how are these limiting thoughts impacting you? And what if a simple shift in the way you think could unlock everything You're truly capable of this is really how?
Impactful the way we think and the way we talk to ourselves is and this internal shift can really help us to move from feeling insecure to empowering ourselves just by asking ourselves questions that get our brain moving towards intentional action versus staying stuck.
It sounds simple, and I always tell people this, sounds simple, but it's not always easy to do. Our brains have thought certain thoughts for a long time, but if we're not onto ourselves and if we're not consciously observing our thoughts, if we're not aware of how we're talking and thinking about ourselves, then it could really impact how we grow so that need for intentional action is important.
But oftentimes I tell my clients that you need to slow down to move fast because if we're just quickly moving and we're in the survival mode and we're doing, doing, doing, then you start feeling like you're on a hamster wheel. I want you to consider how shifting from a place of insecurity to empowerment, it doesn't just happen by accident, it requires intentionality. It requires us to be onto ourselves and to notice our thoughts and what we're spinning in and what we're allowing ourselves. It could be very simple, like asking yourself the right question, which I want to talk about next, but first let's talk about the need for intentional action.
Growth isn't passive. You don't just wake up one day and suddenly feel confident, clear, and capable. It's something you consciously create. And I want to explain that in today's society and our consumer capitalist market, most people and most companies want us to think that we don't know enough, that we need something else, that we are not enough because they want to sell us things.
So we're always, especially as women, if you're on Instagram or if you're watching something, there's always somebody that wants you to have this belief that you're not enough. It's very appealing for somebody on the other end to say you're not enough. Buy this thing, get this bag, get this education, get this certification, do this, do that, fix yourself. There's something wrong with yourself.
So not only do you have beliefs about yourself and insecurities that maybe experiences in your life have created, you're also, depending on what you watch and what you allow yourself to feed on, what you put in your brain, you could also get a lot of thoughts from society, from the culture, from commercialization, that you need more, that you're not capable, that you need to buy this thing or lose weight or get this other certification.
But I want to ask you, how often are you asking yourself empowering questions versus letting doubt take the wheel, take the driver's seat of your car? How often are you mindlessly or on autopilot allowing people to put thoughts in your head? Whether it's watching commercials, whether somebody is telling you you need to work on this, maybe you're also somebody who's out there asking people, what's wrong with me? How can I get better? But even that question assumes that there's something wrong with you.
If you want to be thinking about yourself in a more empowered way, if you want to be intentional about the questions you ask for yourself, then you need to nurture the thoughts that you have and the questions you ask yourself. What you water grows. So oftentimes people are like, the grass is always greener over there once I get something. But what I want to offer you is the grass is green where you water it, where you really focus on it.
Your thoughts shape your reality, and if you want different results, then you're going to need to work on these different thoughts. I know most of the world likes to just take action and action and action, but I'm talking about here intentional, purposeful, sustainable action through asking yourself an empowering question.
Most people wanna focus on why I can't, what's wrong with me, what's broken about me, What do I need to be successful? Most people are not focused on what can I do in the here and now with what I have to solve my problem? Successful leaders focus on solutions not problems. So you want to notice for yourself when you are thinking, what if you could cut out that noise? What if you could cut through it?
What if instead of spiraling in doubt, you could ask yourself one transformative question that instantly moves you forward towards a solution that is really focused on your ability and your capability and helps you to not indulge in those self-limiting beliefs or what society wants to feed you, but really helps you to stay on top of yourself, stay on top of what truly matters to you, and also stay on top of believing in the capability you already have.
So, are you ready to hear this question? It's a very simple question, but it has the power to totally shift you. I wanna share that I use this with a lot of my clients, and as soon as I ask this question to them, they move from spinning, from questioning themselves, to getting very clear, very certain, very convicted in their next step. And it's almost like this question just taps into that part of their brain that was always there, but they're just not used to watering. And so this is really the power of the question.
I almost feel like I need a drum roll, Like drum roll, reveal. This is the question. “If I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I need to do next?"
I know it sounds simple, but just sit with me, sit with this question. When you're spinning, when you notice yourself questioning yourself, but you slow yourself down and you say to yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I need to do next?
And I really want you to breathe in those words. I am clear, confident, and capable. Don't just say it to yourself quickly. It's really important that you slow yourself down, say the words to yourself, notice the emotions in your body, notice what happens when you ask this question. It forces you into a mindset of clarity, confidence, and capability, regardless of how you feel in that moment.
So like I told you, my client was spinning. She was like, I need to reach out to the CEO. I have an intro to him. I don't know what to do next, I'm wondering if I should prepare a long email to write to him to share my case, or if I should do more work and then reach out to him. And I literally asked her this question. I was like, hey, take a deep breath. If you are clear, confident, and capable, what would you do next?
And it only took her not too long, right? She was noticing that question. It aligns you with the actions of the person you want to be, it really puts everything front and center and focus, and your brain starts finding solutions from a place of power and not fear. And so she just answered that question for herself really easy.
She said, actually I would email him, just let him know what my availability is, share that I'm excited to see him. And then on the back end, I would do some research around the company, make sure that I have the notes that I need, and I would move forward in that way. So clear, so confident, so capable of whatever is next.
She's just noticing that this simple question could shift you from feeling overwhelmed, questioning yourself, and this works at home and at work. In meetings, when you feel hesitant to speak up, ask yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next?
I want you to notice that in the question, it's not saying how do you do this perfectly, which is what your mind or your brain might be offering you that you have to do it perfectly. Instead, it's just saying, hey, if in this moment I'm feeling clear, confident, and capable, what's my next move? My next move could be asking a question. My next move could be being more present in this moment. My next move could be asking myself what is most important.
At home, when we're juggling work and personal commitments, it can feel so overwhelming. And this indecision can feel like, you know, we're unsure, get us stuck in analysis paralysis. But just by asking yourself this question, it can snap you out of it.
I wanna share a personal example for me because I was in the midst of making all of these travel plans for me and my family for the year, you know, it's the beginning of the year, I wanted to get all of this settled, it's a practice that I've been wanting to focus on to ensure that I have the rest that I need, the vacation time that I want to have.
And so as I started doing this process, I noticed myself, oh my gosh, so many logistics. What if this, what if that, all of this like worst case scenario. And I just wanted to be like, forget it. I don't wanna do this. I don't wanna plan these trips. It's too overwhelming. I am feeling too much stress. And then I asked myself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next?
And I just sat with that question and I got really clear. I had four trips that I was planning and I got super clear about what I would do. I said, if I am clear, confident, and capable, these are the decisions I would make. So that question helped me get to that decision. It helped me get to what really matters to me. What do I want out of this? What am I willing to do? It helped me to make that decision quicker and it helped me to remind myself that I am fully capable of doing this.
So I want you to go out and practice this. Now that you know the question, the next step is to put it into practice. This is really about building your confidence using consistent action. Each time you're faced with a decision or a challenge, pause and ask, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? Then do that thing. Watch how things start to shift.
And if something happens again, and you get into that cycle of like, oh my gosh, what do I do next? Ask yourself that question again. If I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? First, use this in small ways and build up your consistency and your confidence in it, and then start using it in bigger ways.
But the more you use it, the more you ask yourself this question in a really intentional way, the quicker you're going to shift naturally over time to believing in your clarity, in your confidence, in your capability.
So when I talk to my clients and I ask them this question, they know, they already start asking them questions in advance and they shift to themselves much more quickly. Instead of allowing all of that spinning, that limiting belief talk, that negative self-talk, worst case scenario, they shift themselves.
But it is really, and this is the big underline, it's not just saying it to yourself and rushing into action, it's saying it to yourself and truly believing it. And if you believed it, what would you do next? You need to do this practice over and over again and see what happens for you. See what changes for you as you stop entertaining the thoughts that you're not enough.
Remember, the difference between staying stuck and moving forward is often just one question. So ask yourself, if I am clear, confident, and capable, what do I do next? You'll be amazed at the doors that open when you lead with this mindset. And the sustainable change you'll have in yourself as you keep mastering this, asking yourself that question.
I invite you to share with me how things are changing as you keep doing this and what's coming up for you. I'd love to hear from you. So feel free to DM me on LinkedIn, leave a review, connect with me directly over email. I would love to hear how this one question is having you show up in your life.
So until next time, keep stepping into the clear, confident, and capable leader you are. I'll see you soon.
Thank you for being a part of The Balanced Leader community. We hope you found today's episode inspiring and actionable. For more resources and to connect with Yann, visit us at aspire-coaching.co. Until next time, keep leading with confidence and purpose.
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